INSULTS...!?!

We have been discussing a lot about Human Nature, Behavior and Values at this place. The discussions till this point were focused on targeted on positive and productive values and traits. Today, for a change I am going to share one of the dark sides of human nature – INSULT – to be precise. I am not sharing this just for fun or making my post ‘with grey shades’, as they say. I will never ever write, compile or produce anything that will not have any type of educative, informative or entertaining value, believe me…!

It is a classic compilation of glorious insults from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words. I am sure you would really enjoy the huge humor and overflowing honest generously dished out without mincing the words. They are crammed with wits, vitality and verve.

I am confident that you would agree with me that these indeed have the class that pales the impact that crass insults of modern day could possibly create.

1. The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, "If you were my husband I'd poison your tea."
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."

2. A Member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."

3. "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill

4. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow

5. "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

6. "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas

7. "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

8. "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends…" - Oscar Wilde

9. "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... If you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... If there is one…" - Winston Churchill, in response.

10. "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop

11. "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

12. "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

13. "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Johnson

14. "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand

15. "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker uncle

16. "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

17. "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

18. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde

19. "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... For support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

20. "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

21. "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

Stay tuned...!